The word tween has become very popular in recent years. Prior to this, kids in this transitional age group, most often, were called pre-teens, middle-schoolers, or tweenies. A tween is a child between the ages of 9 and 12 years-old. A tween is no longer a little child, but not yet a teenager. They are in-between the two age groups. Parents and others around them recognize in their behavior and emotions that a change is taking place. But, a tween is also maturing physically, emotionally, and socially and they are learning to take on new responsibilities at school and at home. They are growing into a teenager. The tween years can be a challenging adjustment period for both tweens and parents.
Parents should start talking to their child about puberty as early as age 8 years-old. Build trust and open communication with your child before it is time to have the talk. Don't wait until the child comes to you with questions, before initiating a talk. Children may see something on TV, or the internet, despite your close supervision, or hear something from a friend at school that may make them curious. When everyone around them is noticing their bodily changes, so is the tween. Your child, who will become a tween, will appreciate their parent's guidance and information as to what is happening to their body as they go through puberty.
Many parents are uncomfortable, with even the thought of, having the talk with their child. You may not be sure you have all the facts straight. It is also understandable that parents are not comfortable talking with their child about, what you view as, grown-up topics. But, that time will come, and reading a book and sharing it with your tween is an approach that my mother used, and I, subsequently, used with my own children. It is an approach I recommend. You read the book first, then share it with your tween. Read some chapters aloud together, answering questions as you go along. Schedule times to talk about the book and answer questions your tween will have, once you have left them on their own with the book. Share some age-appropriate experiences that you had growing up. I.e.: At what age did you start your menstruation? At what age did you first need to shave? Let your tween know you are there to answer their questions at any time. Here are some book titles to get you started:
For Girls - 10 years-old and up:
Girl Stuff: A Survival Guide to Growing-Up
By Margaret Blackstone and Elissa Haden Guest
The What's Happening to My Body Book for Girls
By Lynda Madaras with Area Madaras
For younger girls:
The Period Book: Everything You Don't Want to Ask (But Need to Know)
For Boys - 10 years-old and up:
Boys Guide to Becoming a Teen
By American Medical Association
What's Happening to My Body? Book for Boys
By Lynda Madaras
*Additional Resource: http://kidshealth.org/en/parents/talk-about-puberty.html
Copyright: Getting to Know Tweens, Sharon Rose, Parents Want to Know 101, July 20, 2017. All rights reserved.
